After reading thousands of stories from troubled readers, regarding the grave economic situation, I decided to seek the wisdom of the lovable Pikachu. Pikachu is the foremost authority in the field of economics. Transcript follows.
Me:
For fear of more banks going under, I've taken all my money out of the bank and hid it under my mattress. I have $50,000 laying under the mattress. Is that a smart thing to do, or am I an idiot?
Pikachu:
Pika. Pika-pika-pika-pika. Pika. Pika. Pika. Pika. Pika. Pika-pika. Pika. pika-pika-Idiot.
Me:
If the money runs out, there will be no more power. No more food or water. Mutated Zombies will take over the world. Cats will eat dogs. Goldfish will swallow sharks. How can I prepare for this? By the way, you are very cute.
Pikachu:
Pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika. Pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika (Pika-pika-piiiiiiiiiika!). Pika. Chu. Pika-pika. Pika-pika (Piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiika!). Chu. Pika-pika-pika-pika-pika. Pika.
Me:
Should I buy stocks now that they are very low? Or do you think they might sink even lower?
Pikachu:
Pika! Piiiiiiiiiiiiika. Pika-pika-pika (Piiiiiiika). Chu. Pika-pika. Pika. Pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika-pika.
Me:
But wait a moment, What makes you an expert on the economy? You live inside a ball, for crying out loud!
Pikachu:
PIKA! PIKA-PIKA-PIKA-PIKA-PIKA-PIKA!!! PIKA-PIKA-CHU! PIKA-PIKA!!! PIKA!! PIKA!
Me:
Any last words of advice for the readers on how to survive the economic crisis?
Pikachu:
Pika Pika. Piiiiiiiiika. Chu. Pika. Pika-pika-pika.
Me:
This concludes it for today. Thank you Mr. Pikachu for an articulate, in depth interview and very enlightening advice.
Pikachu:
Pika.
*****P.S. this is based on some article I read like 10 years ago in Nintendo Power Magazine where Pikachu answered readers questions on how the Y2k bug would affect the N64.